Free at Last

Yesterday, I decided that it was high time to get connected to the Internet. It's A.D. 2009, I told myself, and everyone and his brother is websurfing these days; why shouldn't I? Nay--why shouldn't I, ba goom?!

So I canceled my account with Verizon DSL.

Instantaneously, my connection problems have ceased, and I'm now a websurfin' fool.

(This means, of course, that the old parody website is Code 423-Locked. But I took the elementary precaution of downloading its contents before canceling the account. Someday, I suppose, I'll post it summers else.)

So I highly recommend to everyone within eyeshot of this page that canceling Verizon DSL is the only way to go!

P.S. The ol' Ball-and-Socket tells me that a solicitor for Verizon FiOS has already knocked twice at our door this week. I just had to laugh.

What's the French for "Fiddle-dee-dee"?

An Ottowan recently visited this blog and had it translated by Google into German. For some crazy reason, I've taken a shine to this bit:

King Kong,
Die Riesen-Gorilla
Stellen Sie Godzilla
Mit zwei ließ Daumen.

King Kong,
Die Simian-Wonder
Sein Brüllen ist wie Donner,
Genug zu übertönen die Trommeln.

Fay Wray -
Ihre Busen sind Wurfleine.
Könnte Adam und Eva konzipieren
Die Liebe, die sie erreichen?

Fat Chance!
Ich wette meine bandanna
Das Adam's Banane
Ist kein King Kong.

(Interesting sidelight: when you paste a cutting from a Google translation, both the original and translation appear, side by side.)

Does the translation have all the charm of the original? I think so. In fact, that it does, ich wette meine bandanna.

A New Kind of Democrat?

Tom Daschle, who had not blotted his copybook in past years sufficiently to alienate That Guy in the White House, has withdrawn his nomination to lead the Welfare Department because of income tax evasion. This, the Nyok Times reports, is the second nomination to be withdrawn today because of income tax evasion.

Is it possible that a new kind of Democrat is at long last aborning--one who concedes, however grudgingly and tentatively at first, that the tax laws apply to Democrats as well as Americans, and that the sacred Welfare State cannot flourish like the greenback tree, unless Democrats also piss their money away on it?