Sprucing It Up A Bit

Four hours on the road between Flavortown and home base allowed me to polish the parody of Cole Porter's I've Got You Under My Skin:

Ann Coulter
Gets under your skin:
She cold-cocks
Liberal piety;
The sacredest cows
Of modern society--
Like buzz words.
And media spin.

The Left Wing
Used to be in:
A sinister spirit suffused
Each editorial;
Our line was seductively slick
And faux professorial,
But, truth-wise,
Boy! was it thin.

When Coulter arose to expose the lies,
We did not know how to respond.
The thing that annoyed us most: she's not only wise,
But she's willowy, witty and blonde!

And you know that her fans
Just sit there and grin.
Gad! but it's maddening!
And just a bit saddening.
But the bell's been rung;
Simply bite your tongue
And thank God
She isn't a twin--
Or she'd reeeeeelly
Get under your skin!

Lyric © 2006 Nathaniel DesH. Petrikov

A vast improvement: the serpentine sinister spirit suffused coming on the brooding flatted la of the scale; the sparkle of seductively slick brightened by the sharped fa, followed by the descending melody for the harumphing faux professorial. I had to replace cant; only a conservative would be familiar with the word. The maddening/saddening lines are a better fit for the poignancy of Porter's repeated phrase. Lies and maddening also recall the original vowel sounds at that point; always a desideratum, to my mind. Now, I must do something about the scansion of just a bit saddening.

The following substitute for But the bell's been rung also popped into my head, but I don't know what to do with it (keep your suggestions to yourselves, please):

Just console yourself
That's she's on the shelf
Next to It,
By Elinor Glyn--
Who can also
Get under your skin.