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Friday, July 22, 2005

Winston Tastes Bitter

I read with sickening dread the Nyok Times account of the House vote to make permanent the provisions of the USA Patriot Act, which prompted a little googling. Sickening dread became horror.

Somehow, I'd missed it: the Act is called the "USA Patriot" Act, because (good God!!) it's an acronym! The Uniting and Strengthening America by Providing Appropriate Tools Required to Intercept and Obstruct Terrorism Act of 2001, if you ruddy well please! Newspeak par excellence: not merely false, no, no, no; but outrageously, cretinously, oppressively, sadistically, ungrammatically false. Room 101 false. My own Representative, an alleged Democrat, voted in favor of the measure. I'm so proud that I've never voted for him.

Well, if we're going in for acronyms, I suggest we rename the Act the Undermining and Subduing America by Supplying Oppressive and Vicious Instruments for Establishing Tyranny Act of 2001. Let's at least call a spade an "excavating implement," and not a "long-stemmed rose."

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